Should Have Stayed Home
by Unorthodox Cliche
Summary: Naruto leaves the house one day on a trip to Ichiraku's. He later realizes that he should have never left the house that day as he accidentally makes all the girls in town see him in a diffrent light. NaruHarem.


Should Have Stayed Home

**Kunoichi**

"You can do this. You can do this! **You can do this!**"

Such thoughts belong to one Hyuga Hinata. The normally shy girl had spent the past hour prepping herself with an endless mantra of how she would not fail, continually brushing knots that formed in her hair as well as snipping any split ends that may have surfaced.

She wanted to be perfect. Nothing would ruin this day.

A light amount of makeup adorned her normally pale face. Her lipstick made her lips seem full and lush, while a miniscule amount of mascara accented her lavender eyes beautifully.

Her mission of the day was to talk to Naruto without stuttering once. As earlier mentioned, she had been practicing for the past hour with her light conversational skills, going even as far as to _henge_ a _bunshin_ so that it resembled the orange clad blond. The picture wasn't to convincing though, for the _bunshin _hardly talked and when it did it would do nothing but stutter and look at the floor. Seeing this Hinata would drop the _henge _and study what not to do while talking. She felt that the ordeal went well, but she had yet to test the results.

With a final brush of her hair she exited her room and the Hyuga Compound completely. The surprised looks that she received from passer-bys left her slightly estranged, but she just docked it up to the fact that hardly anyone had seen her without her baggy jacket. While she still favored the pants she usually wore, the jacket had been dropped for the day and was instead replaced by a tighter, more form-fitting, black tee shirt.

Hinata knew that she had a more developed figure for her age, the only one that could probably compete would be Ino, but it still left her utterly embarrassed when a man would openly gawk at her curves. She did not have the valor and courage (read: rage) that the other kunoichi had when it came to perverts, so instead of giving the customary punch to the face she would instead cower behind her arms and seem even more vulnerable. This of course would entice the offender even more. So to save all the trouble she always wore baggy clothes. Today, however, she was willing to risk a day of embarrassment if it would catch the loud-nin's eye.

With her mindset, and confidence as high as it could be, she proudly walked through the town of Konoha; her cheeks only slightly flushed at all the stares she was receiving. Her destination was Ichiraku Ramen and nothing was going to stop her today from getting what she wanted.

* * *

Yamanaka Ino was bored, dreadfully so. So bored that she was actually thinking about botany. Her parent's ran a flower shop. She was forced to live in a flower shop. When someone has something forced upon them for the greater part of their life they usually tend to dislike that something that was forced upon them.

This accounted to her boredom. Ino was actually thinking, in depth, about flower arrangements. The last time she had ever thought about such things was whenever she was just starting out in the academy. Ever since she began being a ninja she realized how unimportant flowers were, thus she harbored a mild dislike for the smelly plants.

But now she was contemplating daffodils and violets. Roses and tulips. Daises and sunflowers. It was when she realized that she was comparing weeds did she make a proclamation.

"I need to get out of here." She grumbled.

Her plans for escape were thoroughly disrupted by a loud ding-dong that signaled a customer. Peeling her face off the counter, Ino looked towards the door to see her mother struggling with some groceries.

"Kaa-san?" Ino asked. "Can I have the day off?"

Her mother simply shot her a look that screamed 'why do you deserve it?'

Ino almost flinched. Her mother was very argumentative; it was in the Yamanaka genes.

"I just didn't want to waste my day off is all." Ino reasoned.

Her mother contemplated her words for a moment. "I thought Shinobi's got their leave every three weeks. You aren't due for another week."

"The Hokage has some big missions set up for the next month so she gave all Nins an early leave." It was a lie, but her mother didn't need to know that.

Her mother sighed. "Well if the Hokage wants you to be resting then I probably shouldn't have you manning the register."

Ino's hopes rose to a new level. "So does that mean-"

Her mother cut her off. "Yeah, yeah. You're free, get out of my hair."

Ino let out a very un-Ino-ish 'Yatta' and raced to her room intent on changing into something more casual. This was one of the rare moments that her mother was lenient and she was going to take full advantage of it.

Yamanaka Ino strutted down the streets of Konoha in a very risqué white miniskirt just seconds later, topped with a sleeveless purple turtleneck and knee-high, lace-up, boots. She wanted her attire to scream 'attitude' and, if the disgruntled looks from the elderly citizens was any indication, it did.

Not four seconds later did she have a revelation. She was hungry. After a short mental battle her more gluttonous side dominated her consciousness and decided that she would spoil herself today. She had dieted for the past month without any slides and was in desperate need of something fattening, unhealthy, and not good for her figure.

Her decision made, she turned dangerously on her heal (she chose it best to ignore the perverts that whistled when her skirt flew up) and headed off for Ichiraku. Ramen was the unhealthiest food that popped into her head at the time so she chose to visit the best vendors in town.

"I wonder if Naruto-Baka will be there?"

Unlike most of the younger generation, Ino didn't hate Naruto. She found him to be annoying at times and was terrified of his fashion sense, but other then that she had no reason to dislike the loud boy. Seeing as how he never displayed dislike for her, she settled their relationship as 'mutual acquaintances'.

"Maybe I'll catch him there and we can have a bowl or two."

With a new goal in mind, Ino walked briskly towards the famous ramen stand.

* * *

Temari let out a frustrated sigh. "This can not be happening."

Konohagakure and Sunagakure are known as the two most powerful hidden shinobi villages in all the land. If ever two such dominant villages were to go to war the results would be catastrophic. Catastrophe is not liked by many of the human populous. The easiest way to prevent war is with a treaty (and good leaders). Therefore, treaty equals no catastrophe equals happy humans.

One major downside is that to maintain such a treaty there needs to be someone willing to do the dirty work, I.E. travel between the two villages and make sure that one village isn't planning something diabolical against the other. Temari just so happened to be the sister of one of those 'leaders', the Kazekage to be precise. He offered her the job as a sort of ambassador between the two villages, which left her in a precarious situation. One, this was an offer from one of the highest political figureheads in all the land. Two, it was a request from her brother. Add two such influential reasons together and your not left with much of a decision.

She enjoyed her job, honestly. It was easy paper work with high pay. The only downside was the distance between point A and point B. To her it seemed pointless to walk such a length and hunt down one person to hear "Yeah we still like you." Then walk all the way back, relay the message, and walk back to point B with the new message stating "That's good." Then the process would repeat itself every month or so. She was getting bored quickly. Temari did not like being bored. It led to her being a pissy little bitch. Currently, she was in such a state.

So when the Hokage's door came into view with a note pinned to the front stating 'out till five' she was not amused, far from it in fact. Again she sighed, "This is **so **not happening!"

Temari knew of the Godaime's drinking habits and briefly wondered if Tsunade was in truth behind the door, but wasn't taking any calls because she was nursing a hangover. Just as Temari was about to test her hypothesis by slamming the door down, someone tapped her lightly on the shoulder.

"What!" Temari snapped, spinning dangerously on her heel to face the soul brave enough to interrupt her musings.

"Oi, settle down Temari." A man in his teens put up two hands lazily in mock defense.

"Shikamaru? Where's Tsunade?"

Shikamaru shrugged uncaringly and began to trace the designs of the roof with his eyes. "The sign says out till five so I guess she's going to be out till five somewhere."

Temari's eyebrow involuntarily twitched. "Your acute ability to point out the blindingly obvious is amazing, enthralling even."

Shikamaru let out a simple "Meh" in response.

Temari put a hand to her temples and began massaging hastily. "You are not helping. I'm leaving. Tell the Hokage that yes, Suna is still an ally and yes, we will provide any military support if Orochimaru ever tries to attack again."

Shikamaru shifted his sight from the ceiling and lolled his head in her direction. "Such a long message." He grumbled, "Troublesome…"

"Deal with it!" She barked. "Ugh. I'm out of here. Where's the closest food vendor? All this frustration is making me hungry. I need some tea."

Shikamaru clicked his tongue and closed his eyes, giving her question a quick ponder.

"Ichiraku's." He stated rather simply.

"Great. Which way?"

"South" he replied. "About a block or two from here."

"Fantastic." With that she brushed by Shikamaru and headed for the stairs intent on blowing some steam and relieving her stress.

Shikamaru stood in the hallway pondering for a second. "Naruto is going to be having lunch there at this time of day. Naruto is loud…Temari looks ready to kill." He let out a sigh and lolled his head from side to side causing it to crack and pop several times. "Oh well," he yawned. "It would be too troublesome to do something about it now."

* * *

Something was wrong.

Naruto looked to his left.

Terribly wrong.

He looked to his right.

Like a horrible premonition to the apocalypse.

He looked behind him via through his legs.

What was so terribly wrong?

Naruto straightened himself and scratched his head in confusion.

"Why is my apartment clean?" he pondered to himself.

To a normal person this wouldn't be such an enigma, for when someone cleaned their own home and left they would expect it to be the same when they got back, but for someone like Naruto, who was so accustomed to his pitiful apartment being ransacked every time he returned home, seeing his home exactly the way he left it, without any broken windows, graffiti, or death threats, the sight was rather strange for him and left him with a queasy feeling.

"This can't be happening." He yelled while pulling at his hair. "There has to be something going on here." He cried.

A moment passed when a thought struck him. He quickly formed a Tora seal, gathered his chakra and let out a loud "Kai!"

He scanned his surroundings. Nothing had changed.

"Damn it!" he yelled after confirming that he wasn't under some maniacal Genjutsu.

Naruto let out a sigh and crossed his arms thinking about his situation. Something like this had never happened before. For nothing to be wrong, even in the slightest, with his apartment was just…wrong.

"Today's going to be a bad day." Naruto remarked with a grim look on his face. "I probably shouldn't leave the house today."

A loud growl erupted from his stomach and broke him form his pondering. With another sigh he resigned himself to his fate and decided that he wasn't going to leave the house today. The morning had just been to bad of an omen. That conviction in mind he walked over to his cabinet. Upon opening it and scanning it's contents a large grin surfaced on his face. He was out of instant ramen. That in itself was a crime.

"Yatta!" he yelled. Something was horribly wrong with his apartment. It was out of ramen. Meaning that today wasn't going to be a bad day after all.

"Ichiraku's here I come!" He howled enthusiastically. So happy was Naruto that he ignored the chill that traversed his spine as soon as he exited the door.

So excited was he at the sight of his empty cabinet that he never bothered to check his fridge for the left over Miso Ramen from the night before.

So oblivious was he that he never saw any of the signs.

Naruto should not have left home that day.

* * *

AU: Well there's a story for you people out there. This is my first fanfic so please keep flames to a minimal, constructive critascism is welcomed though. I'm going to make this a harem, or attempt to anyway, the contents of which are still pending. I plan on adding Tenten into the mix as well as an OC depiction of Kiba's sister just cause it sounds interesting. If you want someone else just add in a review and i'll try to make it happen.

I'm not really a fan of NaruTsu but if enough people ask i'll swallow my bile and write it. I do plan on adding some NaruSaku but maybe just for a jealousy factor in the story, and some slight bashing. Anything is possible if people ask for it! Except FemHaku...because He is not a She. Period.

Anyway thanks for reading if you did, double thanks if you review.


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